I don't know how many of you are familiar with the state of Utah, but if there's one thing Utah has going for it, it's lots of Mormons. They make up over half the population of the state, after all. Now, that's not a bad thing, don't get me wrong - I do happen to be one myself, so I can't go hating on the population of which I am a part - but it does lend itself to a lot of closed-mindedness. Currently up on "the Hill", where the State Capitol building is, there is a bill that a Sen. Butta...

I sat here in my little teller cubbyhole at work, hearing the words repeat over and over, in the inane, vacuous, insipid song - "I Can Only Imagine". It's a "cute" little song that deals with what it would be like to see Jesus again and what you would do. While I guess the sentiment is okay, I found myself wanting to throw the company-supplied radio across the room, out the door, out onto Fairfield Road and under the eardrum-saving wheels of a passing truck. Why? Because it's pop mu...

I have sat here, watching a televangelist on TV. There is nothing holy, Christlike, or Godly in his talk. For an hour now, he has spoken about “sowing a thousand dollar seed” and that if the 300 people that God has chosen will give their 1000 dollars, they will be made millionaires. Of course, they have to put a disclaimer on the bottom that says “Miracles are blessings of God and Inspiration Ministries cannot guarantee miracles.” Except that's not what the guy is saying – he's promisin...

I recently read a letter in the Reader's Forum of a local newspaper, The Salt Lake Tribune . The author of this particular piece was specifically talking about Mitt Romney, criticizing him for saying that he and his family are patriotic when his sons, rather than serve in the military (which I guess, according to the author, is the only true way to be a patriot), served as missionaries for the LDS church for two years. He further stated that "country should be placed before God". That d...

(Please excuse my lack of lucidity, I'm quite ill and drugged up the wazoo and still I'm stuck at work. Yay.) With much interest I've read the conversation occuring on KFC's thread here , specifically concerning the Hindu prayer offered in the United States Senate floor. For those of you who haven't seen exactly how it went down, I'm giving you YouTube goodness (or badness?) here. Watch it. I know that I've already asked the question "Does God or country come first...

The Westboro Baptist "Church" strikes again! It seems as though these virulent, godless inbred retards have sent a fax to the Deseret Morning News regarding the mine collapse here in the state. It begins with the words, "Thank God for Utah mine disaster." It continues to read that they're going to picket in Utah, with huge banners reading "God Hates Fags!" If (but at this point, it's becoming more and more likely when) they have funerals for any dead miners, they've pledged to be here...

This was originally going to be a pithy one-liner about how the only cereal worth serving in heaven is Cinnamon Toast Crunch. (You people don't understand what that cereal does to me - and I've got FIVE FULL BOXES in my possession RIGHT NOW. ) But, in constructing a line full of pith, I began thinking. What would I really like heaven to be like? What would make some place in the hereafter HEAVEN for me? So I thought that rather than subject the internet to my usual sarcastic comment...

The setting sun burned blood red in the sky, shining down over Tenochtitlán as Rodrigo slowly stepped up the sides of the temple, making his way slowly to the top. Some sort of commotion was developing on the pyramid, and the rest of his small battalion was still out searching for news concerning the fighting force of Velázquez and whether or not he had truly come to punish Cortés for his insubordinance. Rodrigo heard the heavy sounds of the native speech, that foreign tongue of Nahuatl, ...

I read this article today in the Deseret Morning News, and I thought you'd find it interesting: Abstinence education not working, study finds WASHINGTON — Programs that focus exclusively on abstinence have not been shown to affect teenager sexual behavior, although they are eligible for tens of millions of dollars in federal grants, according to a study released by a nonpartisan group that seeks to reduce teen pregnancies. "At present there does not exist any strong evidence that an...

So. I was reading a collection of Far Side comics to take my mind off my pressing need to do some homework, and I stumbled across one that was just hilarious. Ernie is sitting in his armchair, reading the morning paper, and his phone rings. It's God, trying to call 555-5447. But Ernie's number is 555-5547 or something really close to it. So God hangs up. Top that off with the wondrous caption, "From that day forward, Ernie told everyone he had talked with God." And it got me to thi...

So I was just playing around on the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster website earlier today, and I found the 'Hate Mail (and concerned criticism)' section.  It's a treasure trove of very godlike behavior from concerned citizens who feel compelled to call the Pastafarians on the errors of their ways. Here's some of my favorites, edited for the kiddies (and when I mean edited, I mean edited.  Each change I've made for decency's sake will be italicized). -- This is just p...

It's been a long time since I've shat out an article of randumb thoughts.  Maybe it's about time.  (Maybe I'm just delaying typing the next journal entry, because I'm lazy.  But then, I'm typing this, so I don't know how accurate that portrayal would be.) -- Emmy Rossum, please make a new movie.  You're amazingly delicious to look upon, and it's been too long since Phantom of the Opera .  I know you were in that Poseidon movie, but it looked dumb, so I haven...

24 Apr 2008.  6:28pm. What is it about the empty page that has suddenly become so imposing? I've sat here staring at this blank notebook with nothing but a date and a page number written for almost an hour. What's happened? Maybe that's just it.  Nothing worth mentioning has happened since the last time I wrote in here. Boring, boring life. But at least I'm alive - I like that better than the alternatives at this point. Why do I like that better, though?  I'm ...

Gotta love those crazy Floridians. It seems as though there's a motion being put forward to make a new specialty license plate that you can purchase in the 'great' state of Florida.  Yes, that's right - rather than plastering another in your fleet of Jesus fish on the back of your car, you can slap a cross on your actual license plate. Wanna see what they're considering?  It's just glorious, let me tell you. Wow.  That's just . . . special. My issue w...

I know, I know, I know.  You're saying to yourself - What if Jesus what?  What if he wasn't the Son of God?  What if he didn't exist? No, my friends.  It's something far more sinister. What if Jesus had turned to the dark side of the force? -- I'll just let that sink in for a minute there. ... Okay?  Properly sunk in? Here's what I think would've happened.  He would have become like Caesar's right-hand man, you know?  Like...