Self-deprecation is worth its weight in smoldering phoenix-ashes and baby unicorn tears.
or; the list grows . . .
Published on October 26, 2006 By SanChonino In Humor
For those of you who may or may not remember, many months ago I started a list of THINGS THAT MUST GO, or things that have really gotten on my nerves lately. (For those who would like to read the first installment, follow the yellow brick link.) So here it is, everyone – a new installment of the ever-growing list, Things That Must Go! (You know, there is some sick pleasure in ranting, and it’s been quite a while since I’ve added to my list.) So here they are, the most recent things that have been bugging me lately . . .

- Finicky wireless internet connections. Not only are they an annoyance if they cut out in the middle of your surfing, but it sucks the big one if it gives up on you in the middle of doing an assignment for one of your online classes. Suckfest extraordinaire.

- Snow! Ice! Cold! Winter! Dammit!

- The Euro and its growing strength against the dollar. My Spain plans have all been cancelled because the Euro keeps getting stronger, and that means I (in comparison) keep getting poorer, while I’m still earning money. What happened to the US being the biggest, baddest country in the world? I’d like a return to that, please.

- Dishonest people, who lead you on and suck out your soul (and your money) little by little. Stupid girls.

- Old ladies who think they are the exception to every rule and that every person should bow to their will. (Now, I know there are plenty of young ladies that way, and guys of all ages, but I’ve had a lot of run-ins lately with the old biddies . . .) The other day as we were closing up the drive-through at the bank, this crotchety old lady came and knocked on the window (the blinds were already down) and demanded that we do her transaction for her THAT VERY MOMENT. Now, both my and my coworker’s computers were already off and our money put away for the evening, so there was no way I was pulling all that crap out again. So I put on my best fake effeminate voice and told her, “I’m sorry, our computers are off, and you can only turn them on once a day unless you want to call the IT guy. And let me tell you, the IT guy has the hots for me. Last year for the bank Halloween party, I wore a speedo, and every time I’ve talked to him since, he’s always like, ‘so, how about last Halloween?’ I really don’t want to have to call him.” The old biddy’s eyes just bigger and bigger, until she said, with aversion reeking from her sneer, “I’ll just come back tomorrow.” That’s right, lady, take a hike.

- Did I mention winter?

- Dollar bills. They are always disgusting. We need to grow up already and move to the dollar coin – at least you can’t wad that up into the smallest possible space and then hand the wad of miniscule, wet nastiness to the bank teller. We’ve got these fancy-pantsy coins with Sacajawea on them, NOW START USING THEM! AND THAT’S AN ORDER!

- Moving. It’s such a hassle, and my father doesn’t want to hire anyone to help, so we just take little car load after little car load up to the new house, and don’t get much done at all. Could this possibly take any longer?

- Did I mention winter?

Comments
on Oct 26, 2006

I sure hear ya on that snow, ice and cold!  gonna be here soon

Moving is literally a pain!  Movers probably cost about 400-500 dollars...maybe more??  don't know anymore...church groups are good support systems and young friends with strong backs!

Now us old people...well.....I bet that woman spent the night laughing at your story,  I sure did! That was rich!  Did you REALLY say that to her?? 

...

on Oct 26, 2006
You forgot Winter.
on Oct 26, 2006
Snow? Cold? Your living in the wrong state bro

Personally I like Norther CA. Warm for the better part all year, and shoud I decide I want the snow, I drive 1.5 hrs to the north.

Hey, with respect to your Spain trip. If your concerned over the dollar falling, exchange your dollars for Euro's now before it gets worst.
on Oct 26, 2006

high utility bills

winter, such as it is here in Ca.

 

on Oct 26, 2006
Another thing:

- people who think they are the only ones who have the right interpretation to a work of literature, even though you may have seen it from a totally different perspective. Look, Lope de Vega has been dead for the better part of FOUR HUNDRED YEARS and we don't know what the hell he was thinking when he wrote it! It's all extrapolation and I SIMPLY EXTRAPOLATED IT DIFFERENT!

Thank you.
on Oct 26, 2006
- people who think they are the only ones who have the right interpretation to a work of literature, even though you may have seen it from a totally different perspective.


Gaaaa!!!!!! ARRRRRRGRGGGGG!!GGGG!!!!!

That one hit the spot! I totally agree with you! The only one that has the RIGHT interpretation is the Author! So as I told one literature teacher, they should - Get over it!
on Oct 26, 2006
ROFL you're so funny Braeden! I enjoyed this I really did!

I'm so sorry about Spain....wah! I hear you about the Euro though, it's getting really strong isn't it? Those people who thought it wouldn't and were hoarding their countries dollars, now have to get rid of them or they're totally worthless! That's if they aren't worthless already!


Maybe when I take that trip to the UK you can come with us. That's a nice diversion!LOL! I seriously hope you get to go though, one of these days. As I continue to hope that my trip to the UK will happen...one of these days!LOL!


OH, Winter, what's that?! I'm only kidding!!! We got a little chilly air here in the mornings now. Not cold like you guys, but enough to make natural Floridans dive for their jackets and people from up North like me enjoy the coolness for a change. But I do hate being cold! Brrrr....  There, enjoy some heat!
on Oct 26, 2006
Another thing:

- The guy that turns into the car pool lane alone, and then, feeling guilty for having pulled into that lane, sits there with the acutal CAR POOLERS piling up behind him as he tries to get over in the "single occupancy" lanes . . . either don't pull into that lane to begin with, or JUST BREAK THE LAW ALREADY SO THAT I CAN GET GOING!
on Oct 27, 2006
Sorry to hear about your Euro wows, mate.

Wish I could have seen the look on the lady's face in the bank. Good one...

Australia doesn't have dollar or two dollar notes anymore.

Having just moved, I know what you're saying.

As for winter, I just have to say, it's nearly summer here mate. Ah, summer...
on Oct 27, 2006
As for winter, I just have to say, it's nearly summer here mate.


And I suddenly hate you all the more . . .

Maybe I should build a "winter home" in Oz someday, when I'm rich and all. Then I can be in a state of perpetual summer without having to deal with that winter nonsense.
on Oct 28, 2006
Toni and I have plans to move north as we get older that way we won't ever have to cope with winter and all it brings. Ah, tropical days...
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